Giving an allowance is something that no two parents seem to agree about. Some feel that giving a kid an allowance helps to build responsibility, while other parents think that it spoils them. Regardless of which side of the fence you are on with this issue, it is important that you address the situation before your kids begin asking. Giving an allowance is not something you want to do with no thought, after all.
Kids today seem to have the best of everything. I have seen kids whose family is on food stamps carrying 300 dollar iPods. I have seen kids wearing designer clothing while their parents went without even the most basic clothing needs. I have also seen the other way around. Parents driving an Escalade while their teenager wears clothes that do not even fit. Both situations are flawed, and both could be cured by a clear set of standards.
My view on kids getting an allowance is that it really just depends on the family. The family unit is a team. The parents and the kids are all a family first, and individuals second. When times are tough, kids need to know what it means to trim the fat. My parents never broadcast our financial troubles in the least, but they gave allowance when it was deserved and could be afforded. We knew better than to ask for it when it was not offered. It was an unspoken rule in our home. If it was not offered, then it could not be given.
Not getting our allowance did not mean a vacation from contributing either. We still had to do the dishes, laundry, and other household chores. That was our duty as a part of the family. An allowance was a luxury not a right. To give a child an allowance as a right is to set yourself up for all kinds of future problems unless you also charge the child for their living expenses.
Think about it. If you give them an allowance because they “earned” it, but then do not charge them rent, you are sending them some very dangerous life signals. Those children will enter the world feeling entitled, and the world will promptly kick them in the teeth. They need to understand that earning money also comes with paying bills. This will prepare them for life in the future. You can not have one without the other.
When you charge something, it need not be a large amount. The point is to show them that nothing in life is completely free, short of your love for them. Charge a small amount for rent, food, and the like. Explain to them that you are discounting the amount of these things to make it easier for them, but they need to know what life is like outside of the home. This lesson can make all the difference in the world down the road for them.
Allowances for kids is a good thing if it is used properly. Children should always know the reality of life. If you are going to ignore this important part of your child’s development, then you will likely pay for it at some point down the line. The child certainly will.
